Returning from the gym one evening, my husband and I had planned to wind down slowly. My vision of sipping a post workout smoothie and reading on the back porch took a VERY wrong turn with one whiff of the blender. (Sidebar: My sweet, sweet friends, please remember to take the blades out of the bottom of a blender after using it and clean them…your sense of smell will thank you later!) Choosing water instead, I plopped down in the wicker chair next to my husband’s and flipped open my Bible. I had no agenda. Nothing in particular I wanted. Nothing I was anxious to read. I just wanted to be close to God after a long day. The first verse I read has really stuck with me. It said, “The wise woman builds her house; but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.” Proverbs 14:1
Normally I would have breezed over this. At face value it doesn’t appear to be all that profound. But on this particular night, the verse intrigued me. It was sort of like seeing worn cowboy boots on a busy city street and wondering what their owner’s story is. It dropped a wave of heavy importance through me…like that understanding this proverb would somehow be foundational to my future.
Kirby and I are in a very transitional phase of life right now. Like VERY transitional! We are moving around a lot and working really hard to cultivate and share our passion for Christ and watersports. As a girl, one of the things I crave most is to be settled and secure, to feel safe. This doesn’t mean that I don’t want to travel around or that I don’t feel safe. This does mean that I would like to establish “home bases” for us…places just for us, places of refuge. I catch myself slipping into a state of hopelessness after attempting to make each place we stay feel like “home” while none really are yet. It can be exhausting trying to keep track of all of our belongings, packing and repacking.
Reading this verse in proverbs really convicted me. It reminded me that the role we women have in our homes is much greater than what I perceived. It’s so much more than coming home after a long day and just being the dinner-maker…or the laundry-doer…or the schedule-planner…or the meal-prepper. This verse is saying that we have the power to build our home AND that it’s wise to do so. I want to be a wise woman in God’s eyes.
I love my husband and I love doing things to bless him. However, in the everyday grind, I get run down sometimes. Chores become something I would rather pass up for a book and hot tea. I have never considered though that my role in our home is God-ordained for a much greater purpose. I never considered that washing out coffee cups, finding endless pairs to Fox socks, and making dinner mattered to God. It does though. It matters to God and it matters for our future. When we do these tasks joyfully, when we pray over our homes, when we speak life, and are intentional about being a blessing to our families, we are building something that will stand the test of time.
I think the verse is saying that women have the power and ability to change the atmosphere in their homes. We are called to create a safe haven for our families. A refuge from the demands of life. Built on a foundation of Christ. Wrapped in encouragement and understanding. Interwoven with love. Radiating peace and rest. Filled with smiles and laughter. It’s a shelter for our families, friends, and all who enter. It’s a place where husbands and kids come home to in the evening and can take a deep breath because they are home and all is well there. They know they can find kindness and hope there. (not because everything is perfect, but because we as women choose to set the atmosphere in faith regardless of circumstances)
If the ideal home was like a tree, I imagine it would be tall, strong, and wider around than my arms could reach. It would have a HUGE canopy full of fruit and shelter from the sun. It would be well watered and cared for. It would be a place others want to rest under and eat of its fruit. This is the type of home I want to build. Besides my childhood home, there are certain homes I’ve visited that have really stayed with me. They made me think, “wow, this is a really special place; I want a home like this someday.” The Schatz family and my Aunt Lisa’s family are two of these. I have to believe, based on the verse in Proverbs, that the fun, safe, loving atmosphere in these homes that I so admired was created by the strong women behind the scenes…being faithful builders.
“He shall be like a tree, planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season. Whose leaf also shall not wither; and whatever he does shall prosper.” – Psalm 1:3
The second part of Proverbs 14:1 says that we also have the power to “pull it down with her hands”. I would guess this is done with our attitudes, our words, our actions, with our complacency. The Bible warns that this is foolish. We need to be home builders! It starts with what we are doing today.
How are you building your home? If marriage isn’t on your radar yet, how can you prepare yourself to be a wise woman who builds? What can you do today that will positively affect your future for your husband…for your future children? If you are married, and have children, how can you better establish your home? How can you create an atmosphere of peace and acceptance and love?
How can we create the atmosphere we envision for our lives?
You are not meant to be swept up in the flow of life – you are meant to be strong and courageous and to build a home of refuge – enabling love, faith, hope, peace, patience, shelter, and joy. I found this prayer online. It was so spot-on! It really spoke to me, so I wanted to share it with you:
It read: “Father, thank you for blessing me to be a Godly and virtuous woman. I declare, by faith, that I am a blessing and never a burden to my family. I overcome laziness and procrastination. I work diligently and dutifully. I establish an atmosphere of peace and rest for my husband and future children to come home to. I make sure they never dread coming home, but rather look forward to entering their place of refuge. When they come to me, I provide them with comforting and consoling words; words that build up and never tear down. I am the wife you desire me to be. Amen!”
Have a lovely week! Savor the fall colors, pumpkins, and lattes. (I’ll be posting recipes of my two favorite pumpkin treats soon!) Remember, ya’ll are home builders…strong, beautiful, uplifting and courageous! Much love!
Life Update: It’s been positively wild lately. Kirby and I were on a whirlwind of packing, boxing, driving, flying, and unpacking. We cleaned up the mustang to sell and sold our wakeboarding boat! We packed up our apartment in Missouri and loaded our truck for Florida. (There was not a square foot of space left in that thing!) We drove to Orlando with a pit stop in Kentucky to do lessons with a good friend there. We tasted Kentucky proud, Kentucky made homemade sorghum on biscuits and were blessed with a jar for the road.
Once arriving in Orlando we spent the next day praying about if we should check-in for our flight to the Dominican Republic the next day in the wakes of Hurricane Matthew. Kirby had his last wakeboarding competition of the year there, the Malibu Pro, and it was also a good reason to celebrate our one year anniversary! After phone calls, frequent tracking, following news reports, checking in with the airline, and following our peace…we decided to go. We secured the truck and took and Uber to the airport. We found a lot of our friends were on our same flight…as well as Travis Pastrana and his sweet family! (Kirby was excited to say the least!)
We flew over the eye of the hurricane (no, I couldn’t see it from my aisle seat). The weather in the Dominican was gorgeous! The sun shone every day and we were treated like royalty. We had so much fun getting to spend time with friends on the wakeboard tour we don’t get to see very often, and made new friends too! J We were also protected from Hurricane Matthew which was heading towards Orlando and Florida’s east coast. After five days in the sun, two connections and one day later we arrived back in Orlando to repack and drive to Ft. Myers. We made it! It makes me tired just recounting this haha! We’ve been unpacking and preparing the newest branch of our wakeboarding school! We are blessed and provided for. All is well J More updates to come!
2 thoughts on “A Wise Woman Builds Her House”
I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy you blog! Everyone gives me something to think about. Your an amazing young woman. Thank you for sharing your life with us.
Love, Kris Boercker
Thank you so, so much for this message Kris! It really encouraged and blessed me. Thank you for always reading and for you amazing support!! Much love:)